1.15.11 Two weeks of stuff!

Well my grand intentions of blogging every weekend instead of every day already got messed up. My darling husband decided to "fix" our computer, and I couldn't use it all last weekend, so I have two weeks to catch everyone up on today. Take a minute, grab a glass of wine, slip into your jammies, whatever you need to enjoy this long read. =)

Ashlyn was two weeks old last week, so that meant it was time to take her first picture with Pinky, the bunny I made her, to compare her growth for the next year. It was kind of funny because nearly every picture of her I take she is asleep, but in this one she was wide awake. I love that outfit, I think she looks like a baby pretty woman!

Jakob has been acting silly as ever, and tempermental as ever. As long as he gets plenty of attention he seems to be great, but when things go too much toward the baby, he loses it. I don't know what he was doing in this picture, but it makes me laugh. He also desperately wanted to try out the new bows I bought for Ashlyn, and I of course let him. He was pretty proud of them and wore them around the house for a good half hour.

I also bought him a stocking hat to try and keep him warm, and much to my amazement, he loves it and will actually wear it! He looks pretty cute in it, and I was able to snap his picture on the ride home from daycare the other day.

I finally managed to pose Ashlyn for a very important photo. When Jakob was a baby I took lots of pics of him doing "sun therapy" for his jaundice. One of the pics turned out so cute, and with a little editing, it matched the colors in our bedroom perfectly. I blew it up to an 8x10 and framed it, it has been in our room ever sicne. I couldn't wait to try and take the same photo only pink with Ashlyn to add to the wall. It is the whole reason I wanted a pink boppy cover, and a pink pacifier. I included the file from Jakob's so you could see both, and how much alike and different they are. They are positioned the same, have the same number of rolls...just the colors and the full head of hair are different. I can't wait to get this one framed and up.

I decided to buy myself my own "push gift" for being such a rockstar. Plus Jeff didn't get me anything so why not. This is my beautiful new mom ring. It has two trillion cut blue topaz set in sterling silver. Since both my babies were born in December, this is both of their birthstones. It was hard to find a two stone ring I liked, but I really love this one. One stone for each child, and it is only a teensy bit too small. I am going to take it soon to try and get it sized.

Dad and Sheryl came down this week to see the new baby. It was really nice to see them and for Jakob especially, to spend so much time with his grandparents. They are the only ones who live out of town, so they don't get to see each other very often. Jakob loved them both of course, and called Dad "B pa". When I picked him up from school the day they left, as we pulled into the drive he started saying "B-pa? B-pa?" I had to tell him, "No honey, B-pa had to go home."

The last thing for the past two weeks is a sad note to end on, and one that has me constantly in tears every time I think about it. We finally went to get a pelvic ultrasound on Ashlyn to see if the mass was shrinking away as hoped. After 6 long weeks of not worrying about it, like all the many doctors told me not to, my worst fears are confirmed. The mass is not going away, it's 7 cm by 4 cm, It is so large it has twisted one of her ovaries and cut off all blood flow to it. It is so large, they can't tell where it is coming from-if it is connected to an ovary as previously thought or a bowel or some other organ. The only way to find out the answers we need to know is by removing it through surgery. Then she said she is sure it will be benign, but they want to test it for cancer. Now instead of only worrying about my tiny baby being able to handle a major abdominal surgery, I have to worry that this perfect gift God has given me may have cancer? It's all I can think about and I am tired of crying. Despite what others say, I am not strong enough to handle this. I feel like I am drowning. Here's a pic of my sweet baby getting her first ultrasound...

And because I cannot end on that note after all, her's a random pic of my beautiful daughter. I love natural light photos!